The 1st Key Step for ALL Mother Whisperer Daughters

By Val Boyko • October 17th, 2010

woman asking who am I?Where do you start the journey as a Mother Whisperer? Marlene and I have identified 3 essential steps to begin the process of transforming the relationship with our mothers and some tips to get you off to a great start. Today we’ll share the first step.

STEP 1 Ask yourself  “Who am I?”

Get to know yourself and become aware of who you  really are and/or who you want to be – your natural talents, beliefs, values, needs, passions, buttons and fears!

Knowing yourself and having clarity about how you want to be in the world is key to creating the relationship with your mother that works for you.

When we start to discover our true self we become authentic in the world. No longer trying to live up to others’ expectations or playing a role. Our mask can be set aside and we become free to let our true nature shine through.

Start to discover who you are and what you want by answering these questions:

  • What are the best moments of my week?
  • What brings me happiness and joy?
  • What do I do at an excellent level?
  • What’s really important to me? (Is it career, family, relationships, a cause, etc…)
  • What beliefs, values and needs are important to me? (Tip – Notice what makes you angry, because it is usually a belief or value that has been transgressed or a need that is not being met)
  • What am I afraid of?
  • What do I want that I don’t have?

What else comes to mind about who you are and what you want?



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  • COMMUNICATION QUIZ - Can You Make These Statements?

    Ask yourself if you make any of the following 15 statements. Find out if you are expressing yourself fully and are communicating with openness and presence.
    • SCORING The highest possible score is 30, and the lowest is zero. The higher the score, the higher your likelihood of having success in all your relationships. 0-9: You probably find yourself frustrated in relationships (especially with your mother) more often than you would like. 10-15: You have a high aptitude for relating and are open to learning 16-24: You have good relationship skills. How can you apply them more to your mother relationship? 25-30: Congratulations! Your capacity for present-centered relating is at a very high level.
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