Our Mothers as Victims

By Val Boyko • November 12th, 2010

Susan’s recent comment has made me think about the times when our mothers take on the victim role. When that happens we get hooked into either the role of hero or villain.

A friend of mine’s mother was lamenting how cruel her niece was for putting her mother into a home. She cast her as the villain and the sister with dementia as the victim. Her role was one of hero, becoming self righteous on behalf of her ailing sister.

Breaking free of this drama triangle isn’t easy, until we look outside of the triangle and are able to see a different reality.

When we step back we can see the compassion and love that leads the daughter to make such a tough and heart wrenching decision.

It’s the right thing to do, yet so difficult for everyone to face… because it shines a light on their own personal fears.


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