Archive for Resolving Conflict

The Bottom Line in Mother Daughter Relationships

I love the humor and hope in this article! There is a bottom line in all mother daughter relationships, and sometimes a few simple changes can turn around a skewed and ailing relationship. “A great many mother daughter relationships feel about as healthy as a swig of beer coupled with a joint after downing some […]

What is the the Greatest “Relationship Changing” Skill You Can Learn and Apply?

This is a popular re-post and useful perspective for dealing with difficult situations and people. Val xoxo Q. What is the greatest “relationship changing” skill you can learn and apply? A. Understanding “The Three Realities” This is one of the first skills I learned when I was training to become a coach. Over the years […]

Top 5 Tips for Surviving the Holidays

I hope you enjoy this timely re-post: One of the biggest stress makers during the Holidays is when you spend an extended length of time with your mother and family. Let’s face it, spending 24-7 with anyone can be stressful, so here is some Mother Whisperer wisdom to help you make it through this year […]

Communication 101 for Daughters and Mothers – #10 When All Is Said And Done …

Is it time to let go of being right and open your heart to makes things right?

Communication 101 for Daughters and Mothers – #9 Share How You Feel (eek!)

One of the toughest communication skills from Dr Susan Campbell is to  “Speak our pain without blame”. Sharing how we feel is a very vulnerable place for most of us. We are revealing our true selves, without knowing how the other person will respond. When we share how we feel we open our heart. Even […]

Make an Agreement to Make Your Relationship Work

When a mother and daughter commit to working on their relationship together, its important to have common understanding and agreement on things that both of you are willing to commit to doing. This will help you   maintain the integrity of your relationship when the going gets tough. Here are some suggestions. I agree to: 1. […]

When Building a Better Relationship With Your Daughter Isn’t Enough.

In my conversations with mothers, I’ve witnessed the strong drive to not repeat the frustration and pain that they experienced with their mothers. I’ve heard the powerful urge to right a perceived wrong that was done to them and make it better for the next generation.

However, focusing on your daughter relationship may not be enough to fill the hole within you or heal the legacy of hurt and disappointment with your own mother. It helps, but may not be enough to bring you peace of mind.

Daughters, How to Keep Your True Power – A Final Word About Boundaries

Over the summer I’ve been sharing insights into how we can express our true power as daughters. Today I’ll share a final word of advice. Before I do, here’s a summary of the strategies that we’ve covered so far: 1. Be aware of your interactions and how much your mother is still influencing you. 2. […]

Communication 101 for Daughters and Mothers – #8 Recognize Your Judge

It can be tricky recognizing our own judge. When we see a situation our mind tends to leap ahead to interpret and evaluate what’s going on. Its part of our human survival mode. This is really useful when we are facing real danger, but in everyday circumstances instead of survival it often leads to misunderstandings […]

When An Aging Mother Becomes Hard to Love

John Welwood shares a story about his mother and how over time, an old wound became a  grievance that poisoned everything and took away the joy and beauty in her life. If you are dealing with an aging mother who is difficult to love and its getting you down, then read on. In the book […]

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  • COMMUNICATION QUIZ - Can You Make These Statements?

    Ask yourself if you make any of the following 15 statements. Find out if you are expressing yourself fully and are communicating with openness and presence.
    • SCORING The highest possible score is 30, and the lowest is zero. The higher the score, the higher your likelihood of having success in all your relationships. 0-9: You probably find yourself frustrated in relationships (especially with your mother) more often than you would like. 10-15: You have a high aptitude for relating and are open to learning 16-24: You have good relationship skills. How can you apply them more to your mother relationship? 25-30: Congratulations! Your capacity for present-centered relating is at a very high level.
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